


An Order To Go

by Rei382



Category: Fullmetal Alchemist - All Media Types
Genre: M/M, Modern AU, Open Ending, alphonse is hella savage, alphonse pov, but he's soooooooooooo fun to write, how come I didn't do more of that earlier??, ish?, shipper on board!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-14
Updated: 2020-06-14
Packaged: 2021-03-03 19:08:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,128
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24720562
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rei382/pseuds/Rei382
Summary: “I ordered dinner, not strange men,” Ed said. “Who’s this?”Alphonse walked inside the apartment and placed the bag and the tray on the coffee table next to Ed. “There’s no need to rude, Ed. I brought food, too."
Relationships: Edward Elric/Roy Mustang
Comments: 8
Kudos: 130





	An Order To Go

**Author's Note:**

> Don't read when hungry and too far from a McDonald's I've been suffering for the past two weeks lol
> 
> Also, just a reminder that my event is still taking sign-ups! A new and fun (I know, I played something very similar in another fandom) writing event, exclusively for RoyEd shippers! [Please check it out on the blog](https://royedotpoly.tumblr.com/), and sign up if you are interested ~ 😊😊

Alphonse grunted in annoyance. _Damn Ed and his annoying tendency to bring food into everything_ , he thought as he stood behind about a dozen other people in the line at McDonald’s. Behind him there were about a dozen more, poor souls that entered the place after him, including an incredibly annoying businessman who was talking on his phone, rather loudly, right behind Alphonse’s back. The menu was presented, well-lit and in large enough letters to read from the other end of the store, right over the till workers’ heads, but Alphonse didn’t need it. He came into the store knowing exactly what he was going to order: the Big Mac, no pickles (ever since his disease, he couldn’t have any pickled foods), with large fries and large coke. He shouldn’t be having these foods at all, but he was sure his doctor will allow for a slip once in a while, at least, as long as it wasn’t too often. And if not, he could always blame his brother.

Because who on earth thought that the answer to the question _what can be a good substitute for love and fulfillment_ could be a damn Big Mac from McDonald’s with fries on the side.

Certainly not Alphonse, but Edward seemed to be on a completely different current than the rest of the world, especially when it came to love and relationships.

Not for lack of Alphonse trying, mind you. He did everything he could think of. Introduce Ed to his gay friends. Set him up on blind dates. Open a profile for him on every possible dating platform. But to no avail; his stubborn brother just found reasons to reject everyone, and kept claiming he didn’t have time for love life, which Alphonse knew to be absolute bullshit. Ed might have had a graduate degree to complete, but both he and Alphonse knew he was breezing through it, and the only reason for him to ever get a grade lower than A+ was his awful tendency to procrastinate when he didn’t fully enjoy a subject. And yes, he kept a full time job; but he was a guard who worked the graveyard shift almost exclusively, which meant he had plenty time to complete his school work, at least when he wasn’t pretending it didn’t exist and spent his time reading or binge-watching crime TV shows and scoffing at the ‘idiotic, useless detectives not seeing the evidence right under their big noses’.

Alphonse had a few theories as to why his brother was so insistent on blowing away any chance he might have at love life, but his main one was that Ed had, for whatever stupid reason, decided that he must dedicate every free moment of his life to taking care of Alphonse. Which was nice, and Alphonse appreciated the thought, but at the very mature age of twenty-three he would have appreciated a little more privacy and freedom. It was very embarrassing to bring a girl over after an evening out and his older brother sitting at the living room of the small apartment they shared, glaring at him as he walked through the door and start questioning him about where he’d been and why did he have to make him so worried, and have him list the various medical conditions Alphonse was suffering from. More often than not, having Ed waiting for him ended with a conversation, rather than the much less verbal activities Alphonse had in mind for the night.

He was lucky Ed worked about four nights a week, or else Alphonse would have never gotten laid at all.

The line moved, and Alphonse took the necessary step closer to his Big Mac. He only had a few more people waiting in front of him now: he could even hear the cashier asking _would you like fries with that?_ In a bored, monotonous voice. He could already almost taste the industrial beef, which he was partially suspicious was not beef at all, that had lost any quality it might have had by being heated in a microwave… He swore again. Couldn’t the line move faster?

As if God, or chance, or fate, or the damn world had read his mind, the group of five people who were standing right in front of him ended up ordering only five quarter-pounders which meant they only paid and moved to the side, clearing the way for Alphonse.

“Welcome to McDonald’s, what would you like to order?”

Alphonse almost felt his mouth watering. “I want the Big Mac meal, twice, with large fries and large coke. Please remove the pickles from one of them and put extra onion in the other. Make it to go please.”

“Sure thing. Eleven dollars and 98 cents is your total.”

Alphonse took out his wallet, paid, and walked over to the side to wait with the others. In the meanwhile the annoying man who was behind him was holding his phone a little bit away from his head, covering the phone with his palm as he made his order. Alphonse vaguely heard something about extra onions, but the place was noisy and another employee just called Alphonse’s order, and besides, he just didn’t care.

He turned happily towards the counter and thanked the boy (he couldn’t be over seventeen, Alphonse thought) as he took the brown bag and cup holder. He turned towards the exit, fantasizing about the moment he’d reach his and Ed’s apartment and enjoy this extremely unhealthy piece of heaven with his brother –

_Splach!_

Alphonse stood with his mouth wide open as he stared in disbelief at his ruined meal. His and Ed’s cokes were now nothing more than a puddle of dark fuzzy liquid on the dirty store floor. The brown paper bag that contained his precious burger was now soaking wet, and, he was sure, so were the fries. And that without even mentioning the wet spot at a very strategic place in his pants.

He was still staring in shock when the man who’d collided with him swore rather loudly and colorfully.

Alphonse looked up, wondering why had this man thought he had any right to be more pissed off than Alphonse, considering it was Al who’d just lost a perfectly good meal. Some of his lost coke seemed to have reached the man’s shirt as well, as he had several small dark spots on his shirt. This up close, Alphonse recognized the brand, and knew it was quite an expensive shirt.

“Oh, _great_ ,” the man grunted. “I’ll call you back in a bit, I’m having some trouble here.”

“I’m sorry, sir, I didn’t see you.” Alphonse could feel about twenty pairs of eyes directly on him as employees, as well as customers, were looking at the commotion.

“It’s not your fault, I suppose,” the man said. Alphonse didn’t know what to do, so he kept staring as the man looked down at his stained shirt. He moved his hands down, pinching at his shirt as he was examining the damage. “It’s completely ruined, and I have an important meeting,” he muttered, seemingly to himself, moving his shirt about. Alphonse was wondering if he should just walk away and return to the line to order himself and Ed more food, or –

“ _Shit!”_

The sudden call tore Alphonse from his thoughts and the loud _Bang!_ Had him reacting immediately, instinctively bending down to lift up the dropped object. Only when it was in his hands did he realize that it was the man’s phone; a large piece with a huge screen, which was currently on. As Alphonse straightened up he couldn’t help but catch some of the writing on the screen.

**_Solar absorber material and system designs for photothermal water vaporization towards clean water and energy production_ **

_Photothermal materials with broad solar absorption and high conversion efficiency have recently attracted significant interest. They are becoming a fast-growing research focus in the area of solar-driven vaporization for clean water production. The parallel development of thermal management strategies through both material and system designs has further improved the overall efficiency of solar_

The rest of it was hidden under the lower edge of the screen. _Interesting_ , he thought. He smiled and handed the phone back to the man. “There,” he said, and watched as the man took the phone from him, and immediately checked for any damage.

“Thank you,” the man replied absent-mindedly.

Solar energy. Alphonse himself didn’t know that much about these stuff; but he knew enough to know that it belonged in the same field as Ed’s studies, and one that interested him specifically. How many times did Ed start going on about green energy, and how he wanted to get into that field once he’s done with his schooling? Alphonse knew that his thesis wasn’t on solar energy, specifically, what with the very limited amount of sun hours in their area, but it was something about alternative ways to generate electricity; and that was close enough, in his opinion.

Alphonse looked at the man with renewed curiosity, noticing his physical appearance for the first time. He wasn’t too tall. A few centimeter shorter than Alphonse, but Alphonse was relatively tall, as his brother liked to note whenever someone confused the order in which they were born. He allowed a small smile to appear on his lips as he registered that information in his mind. He also had round face, a little bit chubby, even though it was very obvious he had crossed the big three-o line, and by several years, at least. He had dark hair, relatively long for a man of his age, which was a blessing because Alphonse had a feeling that if he tried going for a shorter hair style it would hardly be complementing his rounded face. Alphonse watched the man’s dark, almost black eyes that had a hint of almond-shape, as he was turning his phone over in his hand. A glance down at his wet shirt told Alphonse that was probably not bad built.

He seemed to be exactly the right type. And if Alphonse wasn’t terribly wrong, he had somewhat of a non-straight aura to him, with his silky lilac shirt and black, well-fitting pants.

Bingo.

His smile broadened as he completely changed his attitude. “I feel really bad about this, sir. I, uh, I hope I am not being rude, or anything, but actually my apartment is right around the corner… and I’m supposed to have some clean shirts, I would really appreciate it if you gave me the honor of letting you take one of them instead of the one I ruined for you.”

The man looked up at him, looking both surprised and suspicious. “I appreciate the offer, but there’s no need, I can go buy a new one, it’s no big deal.”

“There are no stores in this area,” Alphonse noted, forcing the smile off of his face and putting a concerned expression instead. “I thought I heard you say you had an important meeting. Please, sir, I insist. I think my father used to be the same size as you and I feel bad for ruining your shirt.”

He saw the struggle on the man’s face, watched curiously as he could imagine the different arguments going on inside that head of his. He was about to say something more, try to persuade him further, when –

“Oh, alright. But please let me buy you your meal again, hold on,” the man returned to the cashier, saying something that he couldn’t hear to the woman who was just about to order hers. Surprisingly enough she moved away and allowed him to take her turn instead. “What was your order?”

Alphonse repeated what he’d ordered before, to which the cashier nodded. The man paid, and returned to where Alphonse was standing.

“I… thank you,” the man said. “I came from out of town for this meeting and I only have fifteen minutes before I have to be there.”

Alphonse put on his most angelic smile. “Really, sir, it is my pleasure.” Alphonse took a few steps towards the trash bin, and shoved the now ruined meal down before returning to his place next to the man. “Thank you for the meal. I’m really sorry for it all, again. My name’s Alphonse, by the way. You can call me Al.”

“Pleasure to meet you, Al. My name’s Roy,” the man said, clearly only out of politeness. He kept looking at his phone, checking the time.

Alphonse looked at the workers behind the counter, wishing they’d hurry up. If he’d have no time for anything other than hand the man a clean shirt then this whole thing was completely useless. As if reading his mind, the worker he was just watching shoved the last of his two meals into a brown bag identical to the one he threw away. She called him and the man, and he took the bag and the new tray with coke from her with a smile. Roy took the bag that contained his order as well, and looked at Alphonse, waiting for him to lead him.

“It’s nice to meet you too, Roy, sir,” Alphonse said, and started walk outside of the store. The automatic doors opened for them, and they walked outside to the warm summer evening. “I, uh, when I picked up your phone, I couldn’t help but notice you were reading about solar energy. Does that field interest you?”

“Oh, yes, very much. It’s what my company works on right now.”

“Oh really?” Alphonse said, trying to hide the smile on his face. He turned into the small street on which he and Ed lived. “That’s really interesting. What does your company do?”

He held the conversation for the necessary two-minutes-walk until they reached his apartment building. “We’re here. Told you it was right around the corner,” Alphonse smirked, and pushed the garden gate open. He let Roy walk through first before he followed him and led the way to the building’s door. He watched Roy glancing at the code lock. He chuckled before pushing the door open while completely ignoring the little device. “That thing never worked,” he said, amused at Roy’s alarmed face, and started walking up the stairs.

Alphonse heard Roy’s steps behind him, somewhat hesitant. He wondered if it had more to do with the way the apartment building looked, which was okay, in an okay part of town, but judging on Roy’s appearance definitely miles below his usual standard; or with the realization that he was following a stranger into his apartment finally dawned on him. Either way, Alphonse didn’t care. Just one more flight of stairs and they’d get to the apartment where Ed was waiting for dinner, and was in for a much better bounty.

“I’m home, Brother!” he called as he opened the door. Behind him he sensed Roy tensing. He didn’t tell him about Ed; he wanted him to meet him, and a part of him was worried that if he would’ve told him, Roy wouldn’t have come. But now, at the door, it was too late to walk away. He turned to him now, smiling sheepishly. “I live with my older brother. He’s a graduate student. Come in, it’s alright.” Alphonse walked into the apartment, and was not surprised to find Ed exactly where he’d left him: sprawled on the couch in his shorts and nerdy T-shirt, one of his school books held in his hands and hiding his face.

At the sound of Alphonse’s voice, however, he lowered the book to place it on his chest and look at him. He saw him sitting up and opening his mouth at the sight of the brown paper bag in his hand; but exactly at that moment Roy reached to stand at the door, visible from inside the apartment. The excitement at the prospect of food disappeared, replaced by a frown.

“I ordered dinner, not strange men,” Ed said. “Who’s this?”

Alphonse walked inside the apartment and placed the bag and the tray on the coffee table next to Ed. “There’s no need to rude, Ed. I brought food, too. That’s Roy. He, uh, I had an accident and I suggested I’d give him one of dad’s old shirts to replace the one I ruined.”

“This was hardly your fault.”

Alphonse turned to flash a grin at Roy. “It was my coke, I still feel responsible.” He turned back to his brother, his grin faltering; but only a little bit. He didn’t want to seem too obvious about his scheme. Not that he fooled himself that Ed won’t end up being suspicious, or finding out; but all he needed were a few minutes of grace. “I’m going to get the shirt. Be nice, Ed.”

With that, he walked out of the living room and to his room, where he stored Hohenheim’s old things. Ed refused to let any of his stuff into his room or the shared spaces. He got the bigger room, which made storing easier. Luckily it was also the one closer to the entrance. Alphonse himself didn’t care about the size or the location, but right now the proximity was an advantage as he was listening for any sign of conversation from the living room.

When he heard nothing he felt his worry rising within him. He was certain that Ed’s natural curiosity would overcome his tendency to avoid other human beings. Or that the book Ed was reading would be enough to make Roy start a conversation, if only to be polite, because he did seem to have his manners right. He almost gave up and opened the closet to start looking for the shirt when finally he could hear Roy’s low voice carried to him from the living room area.

“Is that _Titanium in Medicine_ by Brunette, Tengvall, Textor and Thomsen?”

A short pause. “Yeah,” Ed’s voice said. “I study chemical and biological engineering.”

“Is that right?” Alphonse could hear the impressed tone. He smiled to himself. His plan was working. "I studied it, too.”

“Oh really? I go to UBC, where did you go?”

“MIT.”

“Woah, nice.” Now it was Ed’s tone which was impressed. “Are you an American, then?”

“Not exactly. Born in the UK, grew up in New York. Now I’m based in Seattle.”

Their conversation continued. Alphonse had to admit, with the man’s manners, he didn’t think he was an American; but oh, well. At least Seattle wasn’t too far. And if he was here, then surely he had business here, which meant he was probably around often enough. It wasn’t ideal, but at this point, Al would take whatever he could get. Or, more accurately, he hoped Ed would take whatever Al could get for him.

He opened the closet and started looking through the shirts, still making sure to take his time. He didn’t want to show up too early and ruin what sounded like a very live conversation; but he also had to make sure not to take too long. After all, Roy did say he was in a hurry. Making him anxious was a sure recipe to ruin whatever positive interaction he was having with Ed.

He picked a silk dress shirt, cream color that wouldn’t clash with Roy’s tie or pants. Most of his dad’s shirts were either white, cream or black, and it seemed like the least harmful color. He held the shirt in front of him as he made sure it was good enough. A little wrinkled, but Alphonse doubted he had time to iron it. Other than that he figured it should be good; it had no stains and it didn’t even have that weird smell clothes sometimes got after being in the closet for too long.

He listened to the ongoing conversation in the living room.

“…over-priced. Besides, Tim Horton’s so much better than Starbucks! I can’t drink that Starbucks shitty coffee.”

Oh, dear. Time to go back, if his brother was going to start an argument. Alphonse closed the closet and returned to the living room, sporting a big smile. He scanned the room. Roy was no longer standing at the door; instead he ventured a few steps inside. A good sign. Ed’s book was placed on the coffee table next to the McDonald’s bag, forgotten. His smile broadened a little, but he tried to keep his smugness hidden. Other than food, not many things could make Ed forget about a book he was interested in like that, and Alphonse knew that he liked that specific class.

“I brought you this one – I think it’d look the best on you,” he said. Immediately the atmosphere in the room changed; as if the two almost forgot about his existence, or why Roy was there in the first place.

Keeping his smugness in check became even more difficult. Roy checked his phone. He looked surprised, and the anxiety returned. Apparently, he really did forget about that important, urgent meeting of his, or whatever that was. He walked towards Alphonse and reached over to take the shirt.

“Thank you,” he said, and Alphonse tried his best not to look amused at his mildly embarrassed demeanor. “Do you mind if I use your bathroom to try it on?”

“Not at all! It’s right here,” Alphonse showed him the door, and then returned to the living room. He pretended there was nothing unusual, and sat down on the sofa next to Ed. He reached over to the table and grabbed the drinks from their little tray. He handed one over to Ed before sticking the straw in the second and taking a sip.

Shit, he missed drinking coke.

“Don’t think that I don’t know what you’re doing,” Ed’s quiet voice ruined the moment of fizzy heaven in his mouth. Alphonse opened his eyes to look at his brother, who was looking at him through narrowed eyes. He too stuck his straw through the plastic cup, but apparently did not drink it yet. “With that Roy guy. It ain’t gonna work. I’m not interested.”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” Another sip. Alphonse knew he nailed the innocent look; problem was that his brother knew him too well. Still, it was worth a shot – and if only to get Ed to admit that the thought about dating this Roy guy had crossed his mind.

“Liar. You would never bring a stranger here otherwise. I’m not dumb, you know. Top of my class and all that.”

“Did you tell him that? Might impress him.” Alphonse really should learn to control himself sometimes. Or not. He smiled and took a second sip.

“No I did not and like I said I’m not interested – “

“It fits perfectly, thank you.”

Both Ed and Alphonse stopped talking at once when they heard Roy’s voice from the corridor area. A second later the man himself showed up, still buttoning up the last two buttons of the shirt Alphonse had given him with his original, lilac shirt resting on his arm. Alphonse had to admit that dad’s shirt really did fit him very well. It was the perfect size, and the cream color did his skin tone much better than the lilac did. He looked a bit healthier in it. Alphonse glanced at Ed and was happy to find him staring. Ed could talk all he wanted but Alphonse knew his brother’s taste.

Alphonse smiled and got up, placing his coke back on the table before walking towards Roy. “Great! I thought it should be the right size. Hey, let me get that shirt to dry cleaning for you. Are you still in town tomorrow? I’ll meet you to give it back.”

He saw the uncomfortable look on Roy’s face and felt Ed’s scorching look burning a hole in his head. At least, if looks could do such things. Without letting his smile falter not even for a second, Alphonse pretended he could not read the room, that he was completely oblivious to the tension that now surrounded him.

“Oh, this is perfectly fine, Alphonse. You have done more than enough. I’ll get it cleaned up. You are probably busy and it was just an accident.”

Alphonse’s smile grew bigger and even more polite. “Oh, please. I insist.”

He watched as Roy glanced at his phone yet again. Alphonse remembered the meeting he mentioned, and the sense of urgency that surrounded him ever since he ran into him at the neighborhood’s McDonald’s. It was either going to ruin Alphonse’s little ploy, or play right into his hands. He remained standing there, polite as ever, and waited to see which one it’d be.

He felt a surge of triumph, which he tried very hard to keep off his face, when Roy handed him the stained shirt. “Alright,” Roy said, and Alphonse again pretended he didn’t hear the annoyed undertone in his voice. “Thank you for your trouble. Here, uh,” with his now free hand, he reached into the pocket of his pants and drew his wallet out of it. He troubled with it for a few seconds and then pulled a paper card out of it. “My business card,” he said and handed it over to Alphonse. “I’m still around for the next few days. My number’s on it so you can call or text when it’s ready.”

Beaming, Alphonse took the card. “Will do!”

Polite as he was, Roy smiled back at him. Then he glanced at the door. “Well, it was very nice meeting you both. Alphonse, and, uh – “

“Edward,” Alphonse volunteered. He glanced at his brother, saw him glaring at him before turning to look at Roy.

“Ed’s fine.”

“And Ed,” Roy continued. “I apologize for all the trouble and for leaving so soon, but I really do have to hurry, I have a meeting…”

“Oh of course, of course! Will you be able to find your way back to the main street?”

“I believe I would, yes,” Roy replied, and took a step backwards towards the door. “Have a nice evening, then.”

“You too. Good luck at your meeting!”

Roy bowed his head slightly as a thank you gesture before turning and walking out the door.

The tension didn’t leave with him, though. Instead, it shifted, and Ed’s eyes were drilling holes in him again.

“I tell you, it isn’t going to work.”

Alphonse snorted and walked over to sit next to Ed on the sofa again. Automatically he scooted over, making enough space for him. “And I told you, Brother,” he said sheepishly and leaned forward to search through the paper bag. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” He pulled out his pickles-free burger and then handed the bag to his brother. Oh man, he was _starving_. “I was just helping the man get to his meeting in a clean shirt.” He unwrapped the Big Mac and took a bite. It was nothing compared to the real, 100% beef burgers Ed was making every now and then, but it was trashy and full of flavor supplements and exactly what he was craving.

“Sure you were.” Alphonse could hear the eye-roll in Ed’s voice. “Are you really going to take it to dry cleaning and give it to him?”

“Nope,” Alphonse replied and took another bite. He smiled, amused, at the confused look Ed was giving him. Instead of explaining, he reached for the bag again, and pulled out a napkin to clean his fingers which got a bit sauce on them with that bite. He chewed, deliberately taking his time. He then swallowed. “ _You_ are.”

The confusion changed into annoyed shock. “Oh _hell no_ Al. You’re delusional if you think – “

“I might be delusional, but you’d be a liar if you tried to tell me you didn’t like him. I saw the way you looked at him,” he placed his half-gone burger on the table and took the bag from Ed, searching inside for the fries. He pulled it out and placed three in his mouth. “Why won’t you just take the opportunity and give him back his stupid shirt? What have you got to lose?”

He watched Ed who was busy eating his own burger. He could see the expression on his face, and knew his older brother well enough to tell that he was trying to find an argument against Alphonse’s words. Alphonse knew that if Ed would refuse, he wouldn’t insist, even though he did think his plan was prefect, and that Roy guy was a nice catch. Good looking, clearly wealthy, smart. If Alphonse wanted to see his brother with anyone…

“Fine,” Ed said eventually. His tone told Alphonse that he was only saying that so Alphonse would let him enjoy his unhealthy dinner in peace. Alphonse knew he probably had a gazillion reasons why not; they’ve been through this before, but they never agreed on them. It didn’t matter. Ed had agreed to go through with Alphonse’s plan, and that was enough to make him smile broadly on the fresh fries he stuffed into his mouth. “But you’re taking care of the cleaning and all that shit. I’m just going to the meeting point and give him the shirt. That’s it.”

“No problem, I take it to the dry cleaners and all that. But you – you are going to invite him for coffee, or whatever, I don’t care, as long as you spend some time with him.”

“You’re unhinged,” was Ed’s response as he reached over to grab some of Alphonse’s fries. “You literally just picked him up at McDonald’s. You know absolutely nothing about him.”

“I spoke with him on the way here. I know enough. Now it’s your job to find out the rest.”

“You know he might be straight, right?”

“Oh, _please_ ,” Alphonse looked sideways at Ed.

For a moment, they looked at each other; then Ed shrugged. “Yeah okay you’re right. But still. He might not be into me. He might already be in a relationship. Hell, Al, he’s not even from this country!”

“He isn’t, I asked him on the way here,” Alphonse picked up his coke and took a sip, completely ignoring the shock on Ed’s face at that statement. He placed it back on the table before continuing. “And I know, him being an American a major flaw, but, well…” he grabbed a few more fries. “Doesn’t hurt to try.”

“I can’t believe on you, but whatever,” Ed replied. “Now shut up and eat. And next time, _I’m_ picking up the food. I don’t need you bringing any more random men into our home.”

“With a little bit of luck there would be no more need,” Alphonse smirked, and ducked, laughing when Ed threw a fry at him.


End file.
